Greetings From El Paso

Zeb bought cowboy boots. I'm not sure if he really likes them or if he was just trying to spite me. Actually, I didn't fight it much because when worn under pants they really don't look like cowboy boots. A good compromise I suppose. He's pretty proud of them, when we got back from a team function last night he couldn't wait to get back to the room and put his boots back on. He called Damon and told him about his purchase, and D didn't believe him. So here you go Damon, proof he actually did buy cowboy boots.

More from TX later.

White Elephant

The Breslaw's White Elephant party is a tradition that we all look forward to each year. Invitee's typically include a reunion of the '05 Tahoe Crew and other miscellaneous VIP's. It is a time to catch up, share news, give updates and generally give each other a hard time. This is no ordinary White Elephant party. Some in attendance spent the entire year preparing their present. Breslaw White Elephant Hall of Fame Gifts Include: poop from the coop, the okie outhouse, the infamous "it hit hard tire", and the napoleon dynamite talking dolls - among many others.
Gifts Given This Year:

• Talking Darth Vader Mask
• Okie Live Well
• Portable Light Switch
  
• Sandlot 2 Movie Pack (including baseball and cracker jacks)
• Autographed Elvie Gaskey photo
• Brunette Wig
• Year's Worth of Scratched Off Non-winner lottery tickets
• Meditating Water Fountain
• Chicken Alarm Clock
• Dinosaur Chia Pet
• Kenny Rodgers CD/T-Shirt Set

I'm a little too juiced in my wig. Pretty sure I never figured out how to put it on correctly.


What is your all time favorite white elephant party gift???

Ugly Christmas Sweaters Aren't Just For People

The 3rd Annual (??) Breslaw White Elephant Party was this Saturday. It was amazing as always, more pictures and stories later. This picture of Ollie in his ugly bill Cosby Christmas sweater couldn't wait.

Brrrrrrrr

It's cold. There are not enough jazzy cute scarves and adorable hooded pea coats in the world to make up for this kind of cold. Oh wait. That's a lie. Adorable hooded pea coats do actually make it a little bit more bearable.

But that's besides the point. It's cold! I had to wear gloves and a scarf inside my office yesterday. And I won't stand for this kind of....of...I won't stand for it. Not in Oregon anyway.

Our power went out yesterday evening, and it's not like we actually have candles or flashlights or anything that would help in the event of a power outage. I navigated the apartment by the light of my cell for for a little while, stubbed my toe on the couch, then sat in the dark and waited for Zeb to come home. (Note to self: if there is ever a serious natural disaster I will not survive.)

And you know what, it's such an inconvenience. I drove around in worse than this for a year and a half in Bozeman. If I have to hear "it's probably not a good idea to go to the _____ right now, it's not your driving I'm worried about, it's the other people." I will freak out. Learn how to drive people, so that Zeb will let me out of the house!

I'd also like to put a permanent ban on the phrase "I like the snow, it really gets me in the holiday spirit." F-That. I''m going to go put on my pea coat, sit on the couch and watch the Real Housewives of Orange County.

Dear God,

Lord Almighty, please don't let C.C. go down in a pile of flaming dog poop like Carl Pavano. It's all I'm asking for. I promise I'll do everything right and nothing wrong. I'll be nice to Zeb. Most of the time. Unless the Red Sox get Mark Texiera. Then all bets are off.

Amen.

You can't lie. This kid is filthy. I just hope that the Brewers didn't ride him 'til his arm fell off (oh yeah, they did,) and then forget to have it re-attached. Can't wait to see how this pans out. The bullpen still looks a little shaky though...

Also, the quest to determine professional sports most trailer-trashy team of all time is really starting to get going. I'm pulling for the Oakland Athletics circa FOREVER, or since the invention of white baseball cleats, and the opposition is championing the Atlanta Braves circa John Rocker era. You've got me on the whole John Rocker thing, but the A's have a long lineage of trailer-trashyness Mark McGuire/Bash Brothers, The Giambi Brothers, Nick Swisher. The list goes on. Post up with the team in all of sports history, doesn't have to be baseball that you think personifies trailer-trashyness. We'll poll it out when sufficent candidates have been nominated.

1-Up'smanship Update

1-up'smanship has gradually died down to the occasional mention or chuckle around the office, until this week, when the original 1-up'er that shall remain nameless submitted an end of the term hours sheet for my boss to sign of on, wherein he/she claimed to have worked a full 26 hours in one day. Pretty f'ing impressive. It makes a lot more sense now how she/he has managed to do, see, learn, witness and accomplish so much more than everyone one else in the world in any given day. I only have 24 hours in my days. wheird.

Come On Ride The Train...

...The Swisher-Train that is.* Typically this is some trailer-trashy, Oakland A's bullshit that I would never condone. Similar to the Yanks acquiring Jason Giambi back in the day. Let's just put it out there and say that if you've donned the dreaded white cleats, and stood for everything that the A's do (you know: facial hair, outdated uniforms, green and yellow color combo, dumb facial expressions, jose canseco), there's about 99.9% chance that I will not welcome your arrival on My New York Yankees.

But Giambi won my affection (you can not deny the power of the 'stache.) Oh yeah, I think it was somewhere around the time when A-Rod tried to slap the ball out of Bronson Arroyo's hand during the 2004 ALCS that I said to myself "You know that Giambi, he's not that bad."

Sidenote: Really A-Rod. You actually manage to make Bronson Arroyo look kind of cool. Really.

What was I talking about? Oh yeah, so I was able to open up my fanhood to welcome Giambi, and what do you know? I'm ready to do it again. I for one am a huge proponent of the Yankees aquireing Nick Swisher and here's why:

1. Getting Swisher to play 1st base for a reasonable amount of money decreases the possibility that the Yankees will be drawn into bidding wars over Mark Texiera. Texiera is a great player, don't get me wrong, but the last thing the Yankees need is another over-priced slugger. We need pitcher's people!
   
2. Greg is a Nick Swisher fan so by association Greg is now officially a Yankees fan. Congratulations Greg. I'll teach you the secret hand shake later.

*Yes, I fully realize that this post is approximatly 2 months late, but I figure since the free-agent market is basically in a stand still until someone signs C.C. Sabathia I'm still within my statutes of limitation. Suck it.

Stuck In My Head

Jazmine Sullivan - Fearless. I can't get enough of it. Had to drive to Eugene for an Athlete's Dr. appointment last week and I listened to it 3 times straight through. Also makes for good background music while walking Ollie in the evenings. It's Alicia Keys, Chrisette Michele and Amy Winehouse all rolled into one. Has a little bit of a fun old school/doo wop kind of feeling too. Love. My favorite tracks are all follows:

Lions, Tigers & Bears
Dream Big
Live a Lie
Bust Your Windows
Switch!

Also Making the Ipod Rotation Currently Are:
Kanye West - 808's & Heartbreak
John Legend - Evolver
Beyonce - I Am...Sasha Fierce
Usher - Here I Stand

Bam

Seriously people, I'm looking for better than a .500 average on this next poll. Are there any fonts or colors that are hard to read though? At this point I've spent far too many man-hours on this for there to be little complaints.

Thank you!

Background

Okay, second try at a new background. This one took a LOT MORE effort. So what do we think? Am I there yet?

What colors are hard to read...all that kind of stuff? Help a girl out.

Vote to the right.

Gaaaaaahhhhhh

Yup, I deserve it. That's why this post is a platform for you duck fans out there to gloat and harass me. I mean, when a team puts up 700 total yards of offense - let's just say it - it was a blood bath. Even though we kept the score within a couple possessions the majority of the game, big plays by UO made it impossible to get any kind of legitimate momentum going.

And to make it even worse, my master's degree has been revoked.

Duck fans feel free to post up and heckle me. I recommend "beavers suck," you know - it's clever & never goes out of style.

Beaver's fans please post up and join me in my misery.

It's On

Speculation, rankings, shit talking, and what's happened in the past doesn't matter today. Today all they can do is play the game. In about 9 hours it will be done. Maybe I'll finally be able to take a deep breath then. GO BEAVS!!!!

A Picture says 1000 Words

I'm pretty sure I won't sleep tonight. Too juiced. Enough said.

Starting the Rivalry Young

Blog Neglect

Oh hi, it's been a crazy few weeks? Or however long it's been since I blogged. Damon "accidently" posted some awkward clip about a guy who puts pocket change in his butt for some sort of social revenge. He deleted the post, but somehow it's title stayed linked to my page. Awesome. And to make matters even better, I was busy neglecting my blog, so I didn't post anything new to cover up the faux pas. Glad that's over. If you never noticed this random issue, go ahead and disregard this whole paragraph.

If you haven't noticed yet, the biggest news right now is Civil War. Saturday can't get here soon enough. Once this weekend is over, hopefully I'll be having a lot of celebrating to do, but I also have a lot of blogging to do, including the following:

• Yankees aquire Nick Swisher.
• What I'm Listening To
• I thought there were more...

Crazy Civil War Moments

Check out these civil war moments that have fanned the flames of the rivalry...

Here are some of my highlights, but for the full story and other civil war articles click here. Also, check out this link to some funny civil war t-shirts.

1954: A group of 50 to 60 Oregon students touched off Oregon State's homecoming bonfire in the middle of the night in Corvallis -- a traditional Civil War prank. But Oregon State students cornered 15 to 20 of the invaders and held them prisoner. Captive Oregon students had their heads shaved, were painted orange and black and some were forced to do housework at fraternities. One was led through campus bearing a sign that read: "I'm a dumb Duck." Oregon won that year 33-14.

1960: Ardis Henry, Oregon State's homecoming queen, was abducted in front of her Azalea House residence in Corvallis and returned unharmed a half hour later. Before her return, Oregon State student body president Dick Seideman received a ransom note demanding he ride a child's scooter to 13th and University Street in Eugene and make a public appeal for Henry's return. The game in Corvallis ended in a 14-14 tie.

Reason # 604,765 Why Not to be A Duck

Reason # 604,765 Why Not to be A Duck: ROBODUCK

Even the duck faithful hate him, there is just no excuse for this:

Happy Civil War Week!

Just to start the week off right, here's a video to help refresh you on the most recent chapter in Civil War History. Make sure you Vote Sammy & Oregon State in this week's ESPN Pontiac Game Changing Performance poll & check out the Rodgers brothers in this ESPN feature that ran Saturday morning.

Civil War Shanty Town

I have never in my life seen such a thing. Student's camped out in the parking lot to line up for first dibs at civil war tickets. This picture was actually taken a little bit after the makeshift shanty town started to break up. At it's peak there was a dense line of tent spanning about half way around Reser stadium. Another revelation: OSU students are filthy pigs (i mean that in the nicest way) our parking lot was a mess! Starbucks cups, miller high life cans, burger king bags, and even a random bottle of chloraseptic spray were strewn across through out the area upon their abandonment. I even saw a girl who built her own little shack out of folding tables she found left over from gameday. Apparently this game is a pretty big deal.

New Background?

Saw a link to thecutestblogontheblock.com and I couldn't resist playing around with it. It was an ambush of various fruity blog layouts; I think I almost had a seizure while looking at them all. This was the one I came up with, but I'm still not sure if I like it. So I'm going to leave it up to the readership. What do we think?! Poll to the right.